Wednesday, December 18, 2013

A Small Christmastime

Sometimes I just get tired...really tired.  You know that bone aching, brain fogging tiredness that a morning, noon, and night coffee addiction cannot even begin to touch.  I’m in that place right now and it does not balance well with what season the calendar tells me we’re in.  Bleh.  

Ever been there?

This year it’s for some very simple reasons.  My life is in transition.  Saying good-bye to what was, and saying hello to God only knows...

When my children transition from one stage to the next, I know it’s happening because they sleep more, eat more, cuddle more, and are more sensitive than normal.  I call it a growth spurt and I celebrate it because I know there is a blooming right around the corner.  I curl up with them and snuggle just a little bit longer because they need their energy and strength to burst into the next stage of their life. 

But when I hit these transitions I do not give myself this sort of graceful living.  I call myself lazy when I need more sleep.  I call myself sloth when I need more food.  I call myself needy when I desire more affection, and I call myself crazy when I’m more sensitive to the harshness in life.

Ever been there?

How in the world do I balance this with the Christmas season?  One day at a time I guess...

...because...

Who says Christmastime needs to be so full?  God with us is all the fullness needed.

Who commanded I be at the top of my game so that peace, love, and joy can come in?  Nothing needs earning, these things are offered freely.

Who says perfection is the goal?  I think brokenness is what makes us human...and God chose to be human for a season...so this humanity thing must be important.

I have no idea what I want this season to be like.

Ever been there?

I know I want my children close.  I know I want less rush and more silence.  I know I want celebration...but a quiet one.  I want a small Christmastime.

Ever been there?


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